Among the many undeniably valuable contributions that lawyers make to society, here’s one you almost never hear people talk about: 

LAWYERS SAVE LIVES

That’s right.  We save lives every day — probably more than all the doctors and nurses on the planet combined.  We’re just too modest to toot our own horn.

How?  Close your eyes for a moment and imagine a world without . . . WARNING LABELS. 

It was horrible, wasn’t it?  People poking their eyes out, crashing into each other, setting themselves on fire, blowing things up.  All of these potential disasters are averted every day by humble lawyers cramming big words onto tiny labels that no one will ever read.

So, without further ado, here’s the first in our series of . . .

GREATEST HITS OF LAWYER-DRAFTED WARNING LABELS

• On a Superman costume:  Wearing this garment does not enable you to fly
• On a hair dryer:  Do not use while asleep
• On a vacuum cleaner:  Do not use to pick up anything that’s currently on fire
• On an iron:  Never iron clothes while on body
• On an air conditioner:  Avoid dropping air conditioners out of windows

I rest my case.  Stay tuned for more.

(Thanks to The Dumb Network, dumbwarnings.com)

This entry was posted on Friday, February 15th, 2008 at 6:51 am and is filed under Dumb But Fun Posts, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.